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3 Tips to A Happier Family

Hey! Welcome to the Blog! One of the things that's coming up for my clients most often when we work together is their stress.  They don't believe they can achieve their goals and manifest abundance or get the Law of Attraction working for them when they're so stressed all the time.

Well, they're kinda right.  When you're feeling stressed you're going to find it very hard to attract the things you want into your life [Related Post: Why do we attract what we focus on?]

The good news is, there are some easy ways you can reduce your stress to get yourself into a more positive state - the perfect state for manifesting!

Stress shows up for us as a result of an imbalance in one or more of 5 areas of our lives: Relationships and Family Life, Money, Self Care, Sleep, Mindset/Attitude. 

In this Blog Post I'm going to give you 3 Tips to a Happier Family to reduce your stress in that area.

When you feel stressed, from any area of the 5 areas, it’s natural to want to ‘off load’ that stress onto those closest to you.

You may be feeling a little resentment towards your partner. Maybe envious of all the ‘free time’ he gets while you’re working your arse off. You might find yourself snapping at him over very small things, arguing, not talking and other ‘non-healthy relationship’ things. 

Or maybe you feel you’re constantly having to moan at your kids, you can’t remember the last time you actually had fun with them and then you feel guilty for not being a superstar parent.

Please understand that it’s normal to feel this way when you’re stressed so firstly, if you’re reading this now feeling guilty because you see yourself in those things, give yourself a break. 

Secondly, it is totally possible to improve your relationships and have a much happier family with some simple but powerful tools and techniques. Things that you can start to build into your daily life to see quick results.

Implement the following tips every day for the next 7 days (and beyond of course!) and they will then start to feel more habitual.


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Happier Family Tip One: Remember Why

Your thoughts affect EVERYTHING. So when you can change your thoughts about something to more positive ones, your brain will respond by focusing on those good thoughts and being on the lookout for more of those things that give you those thoughts. 

When you’re constantly thinking about:

  • How annoying your partner is
  • Moaning that you have to pick up his socks from the floor AGAIN
  • Rolling your eyes when you put the toilet lid down after he’s used it...

It’s easy to forget about all the wonderful things there are about him which is the reason you’re with him in the first place right?).  You therefore stay in that negative mood towards them. This of course spurs the arguments, the resentment and even more stress.

This also mean sometimes you go to bed angry and frustrated which results in you not getting a great night’s sleep which in turn affects everything else in your life. [Related Post: 3 Tips to a Better Sleep]

So here’s what I want you to do:

Grab a piece of paper/journal/old envelope again (it doesn't matter what you use) and do the following every evening before bed (you can do this in the morning instead if you wish, the point is to actually DO IT, but before bed is a great time because then you go to bed thinking the positive thoughts which will improve your sleep):

Write down Ten things you love about your partner, right in that moment.

These don’t need to be massive life altering, earth shattering things that rock your world….they could be simple small things but when you think about them make you feel grateful.

Such as:

  • I’m so grateful he made me a cup of tea in bed this morning
  • I love how brilliant he is with the kids, he’s such a fun dad
  • He’s very supportive and works so hard for our family
  • I love his smile
  • He looks so handsome in that blue shirt

That kind of thing.

Just get into the habit of THINKING about the things he is or does that make you feel happy, grateful and loved.

And yeah, this may be very difficult at first attempt if you’re so used to thinking about all the ways he pisses you off but this is why it’s so important to come up with Ten. Find SOMETHING. Even if it’s that he always knows how much jam to put on your toast! Once you start doing this every day you’ll find it so much easier to come up with Ten things and you’ll actually be on the lookout throughout your days for things you can add to your list that evening. This will make you more appreciative and generally a nicer person to be around.

He’ll then notice that you’re ‘noticing’ things and he’ll go out of his way to be ‘that guy’ for you - men love that stuff 😉

Happier Family Tip Two: Bring Out Your Inner Child!

Ok, let’s turn to your kids.

This one might be a little more difficult…….are you ready…?

Here’s what I want you to do every day….

Play with your kids!

Yep, that’s it.

Sounds easy right?

Well it is…... and it isn’t.

It’s easy because it doesn’t take much effort.

It’s not easy because it takes a lot of effort!

I know, weird.

Here’s the thing. We put so much pressure on ourselves as mums to be the absolute best. The best mum, house-keeper, cook, taxi driver, role model - and all while holding down a job or all the other 47 million things we think we have to get done in a day….that sometimes it’s so easy to forget to REALLY play with our kids.

There’s always dishes to be cleaned, clothes to put in the wash (and then hang up and then put away and then wash again…..insert eye roll here!) that we feel we SHOULD be doing something. So when we sit down to play with our kids there’s that nagging voice in our head that says we haven’t got time for this and we should be doing something else.

Tips for a happier family and less stress in the home

So I’m going to challenge you here.

I want you to set at least 30 minutes a day - schedule it in if you have to - to play with your kids. And I want to be clear here, I don’t mean 30 minutes where you half heartedly watch them do a puzzle while you’re thinking about what you’re going to cook for dinner or whether you paid that bill or not…..I mean REALLY play. Get involved with what your kids want to do. Even if that means building a fort out of the sofa cushions or pretending you’re a pirate or even god forbid wanting to get the finger paints out……

Allow yourself 30 minutes a day (at least) to REALLY play. This is going to feel amazing for your soul (we’re all big kids deep down) and your children will see you being fun and spontaneous and laughing and smiling and you’ll feel much more of a connection with them. You won’t always feel like the nagging parent while your partner is the ‘fun one’.

And here’s the thing.

The dishes will still be there later. The world isn’t going to end because you don’t fold the laundry. Lives won’t be ruined because you don’t cook a 3 course dinner from scratch. But your kids grow up so fast (I can’t believe my daughter is starting school this year!) and the time you spend with them playing now… going to have a positive impact on them forever.

And when you’re playing and laughing your brain is going to pick up on it and send those happy chemicals shooting around your body again to give a boost to your mood so everything after, all those chores, will feel so much easier to complete.

Happier Family Tip Three: Share The Love!

This one is probably going to feel super awkward at first but I’m sure will be so fun after a while that you’ll actually look forward to doing it every week!

This is the ‘next step’ from Tip One where you wrote down Ten things you love about or are grateful for about your partner

But the point here is to get the whole family involved.

Set a time where you will each share something you love about or are grateful for about someone else in the family. There are no real ‘rules’ here, start your own tradition.

So you may decide to do it every Sunday at breakfast. Or maybe every single evening at the dinner table. Or perhaps if Saturday Night is movie night, you do this before putting the movie on. The decision is yours and that makes it even more fun because it’s personal to you and your family.

Get the kids involved (if they’re old enough) and encourage them to write down or think about something during the day that they will share. Or maybe get them a nice notebook they can write things down in and then they can share one or two things from it at whatever time you choose (kids love this as they thrive on feeling involved and included).

Again it’s not about what you share (my friend did this for the first time the other evening and her daughter said that she loves her so much because she makes the best fish finger sandwiches….) it’s about building the habit and tradition of sharing your appreciation, love and connection with each other as a family. As humans - especially as women - we naturally want to give give give all the time. It’s wonderful to share what we love about our family and see them light up but it’s also an amazing feeling to receive such love and gratitude back (even if it’s fish finger sandwiches…).

Tips for a happier family, love, gratitude to reduce stress

A happier family = less stress.

Give it a go. What have you got to lose right? You might all feel awkward (well your kids won’t 😉 ) at first but that’s part of the fun!

I’d love to know which one of the above you’re DEFINITELY going to try on today (I’d suggest them all but don’t want you to get overwhelmed and so if you want to choose just one that is ok too) - Comment Below and let me know!

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